I always hear people complain about Monday being a bad day. I guess that I'm just not "normal" in any regard, because my Monday went perfectly well (aside from being in a ton of pain from pushing myself last Thur-Sun). Instead today, Thursday, was like a Monday for me. As usual, my insomnia has been horrible. I didn't fall asleep until sometime after 3am
last night this morning. My daughter home schools online through our school district and on Tues and Thurs she goes into the building and does her online lessons in the library that way if she needs any help from a teacher, she has quick easy access to one. She's a senior this year. She woke me up at 7:10am this morning by coming into my room saying "Mom! Wake up! Sasha was starting to throw up so I hurried and got her outside and hooked her to the chain but she just laid down on her side and white foamy vomit is coming out of her mouth! Is she dying?". I dutifully get out of bed exclaiming that I don't know if she's dying or not. Walk outside to see her standing there perfectly fine, wagging her tail at me. -Oh Sasha is my baby, I mean, my puppy that my parents got me after my husband walked out on us. I laughed at them and asked "Consolation prize?" lol. Anyway, I brought her back in and flopped myself down into my computer chair. I was so tired that my vision was blurry and my head was killing me. Daughter exclaims that she has to leave for the bus stop (2 houses down from us).
Five minutes after she left, I hear her coming back onto the front porch. She came inside and said that our neighbor lady is sitting on the porch and told her that she'd missed the bus. I wanted to
choke call the bus garage to ask them why in the world the bus came 20 minutes earlier then they'd told us it would be here. I just honestly didn't have the strength to deal with calling anyone and complaining though.
My daughter got a ride to school, and by this time I know there's no way in heck that I'm going to get back to sleep. My insomnia is honestly horrible! No matter how tired I am, I just toss and turn and my body starts hurting until I just give up and crawl out of bed. There wasn't any use in trying, so instead I
drag myself walk to the kitchen needing to make coffee. Now, my Keurig Platinum Edition had broke on me like 3 weeks after my husband walked out of our lives. Oh how I coveted liked that Keurig. After "hubby" leaving me out of the blue and not paying me any support, a new coffee maker just wasn't in the budget. A lovely, caring friend bought me a Mr. Coffee machine. I threw a coffee filter in, filled it with coffee, quickly measured the water and poured it in, and hit that power button. I grabbed a coffee cup, threw in some sugar, a little milk, then I stood there looking at the machine begging and pleading for it to hurry up and make enough coffee to use the "sneak a cup" feature and get my first cup of java. Thankfully after what seemed like a thousand years I was able to pour a cup.
I made my way back into the dining room and flopped down in my computer chair again. -More like slowly sat down saying some
curse words "ow oww oww's" under my breath. I stepped in a broken outlet box of some kind in the lobby floor at Fort Rapids on Sunday. It twisted my knee and it's just completely done right now. Standing up, sitting down, walking down steps (one stair at a time like a 2 year old would) is causing me immense pain. I get sat down, savor the aroma of the coffee as I'm bringing the cup to my ever waiting lips, and sigh as I'm taking a sip of the wonderful smelling, very needed, anxiously awaited coffee. I swallow then think "what the?!"! I take my finger and wipe my tongue. Guess what I wiped off of it? Yep, coffee grounds. Really?? That's the thing I dislike the most about standard coffee makers. If you don't get the filter in there just perfectly, you end up drinking coffee grounds. Such a mean, cruel joke to my blurry eyed, head throbbing, self.
After fixing the coffee situation, I sit down again in my computer chair. This time I'm
praying determined that I won't let all of this ruin my day. I even posted about my morning on my personal facebook status and remained doubtful hopeful that the day would have to get better, it certainly couldn't get worse. Besides, if I posted it on facebook then it had to be true that it'd get better, because it was "facebook official". Did you know that if something is posted on facebook, then it has to be right? My daughter and her friends had taught me that. I thought I was being a totally hip and cool mom good mom by remembering this and posting it to help my day.
Well, let me tell ya ....apparently that
bs saying about something having to be true because it's "facebook official" was nothing but a big lie. Imagine me forcing a smile smiling, determined that my entire day wasn't going to be ruined by lack of sleep and problems from the morning, walking into my bedroom. I stop, flip on my light and Holy Mother I gasped right out loud. My bed, my floor, my ROOM was covered in this whitish/green fluffy material. I unbelievably frantically start scanning my room. As my eyes (that made my head hurt worse to move them) reached the top left corner of my bed, I almost started screaming crying. The corner of my sheet had come off my bed. My four month old memory foam bed. That I wanted for the last year. That is the ONLY thing that keeps me from waking up with unrelentless pain. That I'm still paying on when I don't even have ANY income. Has a big sized HOLE in it! I'm standing there horrified and look down to see that stupid "poor, sick puppy" that started this whole mess of a day, proudly looking up at me and wagging her tail. I tried to regain my composure, as rage filled me. I seriously didn't know whether to cry, choke scold the dog, or just throw myself down while kicking my feet, pounding my fists, and screaming at the top of my lungs!
After calming myself down a bit, I reasoned that it was partly my fault too, because my bed has a mattress cover that zips around the entire thing and I didn't have it on there. I had washed it a few days ago and it seriously takes three of us to take it off or put it on. Therefore, I had it laying on top of my dresser. I decided on the spot that neither of my dogs are EVER allowed in my room again! I don't have a real door on my bedroom though. I have one of those cheap accordian doors on it that you can buy at Home Depot or Lowe's. The dogs just bash it with their heads, and into the room they go. I had a cut piece of plywood that comes up to about my knee level (too high for them to jump over it) so I've now blocked off my doorway with that, until I can find the money to buy real door to keep shut!
As I sat here watching the clock waiting on my daughter to get home from school, I decided that there was no way in the world that I was even going to attempt to make a dinner tonight. She walked in from school and I looked at her with a
wild look about me smile and calmly stated that we were going to Burger King for supper tonight and not to argue about it or say a word. Just to smile, nod, eat, enjoy, laugh, and have a good time with it.
So, I've decided that tomorrow will be a better day and this time I'm not making it "facebook official". I'm making it "The Fibro Frog official" instead! =) Right now, it's 12:07am and here I still sit. Still feeling like a slug. Still in pain. Still tired. Still dealing with insomnia. Tomorrow
today though, I'm NOT getting out of bed at 7:10am for ANYTHING! I shall sleep what I can, and the world will wait for me. If not? That's ok too!
Oh! -That photo above? Yeah, that is not my mattress, nor my house, nor my photo. You want to know why? Because I didn't have enough wits about me when it happened to take a photo of my own mattress. Had I done that though, I have to say that my photo would be the ONLY photo of a