Saturday, March 24, 2012
One of the first things a person with fibromyalgia or any type of chronic pain disorder usually learns, is that they have to pace themselves. I'm well aware of this, yet sometimes I "forget" and think I can just do whatever I want, whenever I want. Even though I know better, that's what happened yesterday.
My husband is an avid sportsman. He loves hunting and fishing. All of the fishing he's done throughout his life, he'd never gone Walleye fishing during the annual run. I couldn't believe it, because the Walleye run is a big deal around here. When the run is at it's prime, you drive past the Maumee River to see guys lined up shoulder to shoulder out in the water.
This photo represents a very small amount of people, late in the evening Wednesday, in one particular spot. To be completely honest, I took this photo more for the cloud that appears to have a silver lining then I did to try and capture the fishermen LOL. Anyway, Jason had decided that this year he wanted to try Walleye fishing. He bought a pair of waders from the next door neighbor, who hunts and fishes with him, and he was itching to get out there.
Jason had yesterday off of work, and that was to be his first day Walleye fishing. He'd asked me if I wanted to go along with him, to get out of the house. I said yes, that I'd take along my Kindle to read, and I'd take my camera. Even though I still have a lot to learn, I love photography. It's what I do for fun and relaxation.
I knew that I'd have to get up early, which is usually a problem for me where I have such trouble falling asleep at night. I kept telling myself that it didn't matter, that I'd will myself to sleep if I had to. I just wanted a fun day out of the house. Yeah, well, that went over real well LOL. The more I'd try to fall asleep, the more frustrated I'd get that I wasn't falling asleep, until I had myself in a great big mind tangle. I finally gave up and crawled out of my bed, out to my computer for awhile.
All of a sudden I hear "Amy. Amy get up. Are you still going with me?". I crept my eyes open, and moaned "Yeah, I'm getting up" :sigh: Four hours of sleep. Jason has a big truck. This truck is high, and it doesn't have running boards to use as a "ladder" to get in. I'm 5 foot 3 inches tall. I usually never go anywhere with him if he's taking the truck, because I have to grab and pull my big butt into this thing. I know it's going to hurt my shoulders and knees getting in and out. I kept thinking to myself "Today I don't care. I'm going to do it!". Mistake number 2.
Mistake number 3 for me, was getting in and out of the truck more times then I actually had to. His first stop was to Walmart to get his fishing license. I thought about waiting in the truck for him, but we were at a store! Items to look at. People to watch. Out among the living and breathing! How could I just wait in the truck? So, out slides my big butt and into the store I march. Mistake number 4? I walked right past the carts instead of getting one. I usually always push a cart, even if I'm only grabbing one or two items. It helps me walk and stand without as much pain, if I'm pushing or leaning on a cart.
Jason decided to go to the Sandusky River, rather than the Maumee River yesterday morning. Unlike at the Maumee river where there's a whole parking lot dedicated to the river. Where you can see the river and watch people fish right from your vehicle, the "fishing hole" at the Sandusky River is down a large grassy embankment. He looked at me, and I looked at him. Then I said "Just put my chair down here. I'll sit up here and watch.". He helped me get myself situated (right along side train tracks btw) and down he went to go stand in the cold river water and fish.
I forgot to tell you that when we got ready to leave, my Kindle had a dead battery. Yep, of all times. Jason grabbed the laptop and said that I could charge the Kindle off the laptop, and read while it was charging. So I'm sitting there with a heavy laptop on my lap, my Kindle with it's charging cord hooked between the laptop and the Kindle, a huge bottle of iced tea, the bag I carried the laptop and Kindle in, and my camera with the big lens attached. All of a sudden I hear a vehicle. I look up and a guy in a railroad truck was mosing towards me down the lane beside the tracks, at the top of the hill, I was sitting at. He stops and waves. So now, I'm trying to get out of the camp chair with all of this stuff on me and on the ground around me. I have to pick it all up and drag the chair to where I was nearly standing on the tracks to let him pass by.
I'm not gonna lie, by this point I was tired. I hurt. I was pretty disgusted with the entire day. I move everything back to it's original spot and sit down again. Now, the Kindle isn't charging off the computer. It's still dead. I have nothing to read. There's absolutely nothing "pretty" to take pictures of. It's getting hot out which makes me feel crummy to begin with. I have to use the bathroom with absolutely nowhere to go. By this point, I was kind of cussing myself out for coming along.
What happens next:? Oh no! Here comes the first of many trains that past by me so close the ground was trembling. I just thought the whistle was loud. The high pitched screech of the wheels on the tracks forced me to grab both ears and cover them. It felt like someone was shoving ice picks through my ears, into my eardrums! All I kept thinking was "Please don't let this train derail!".
After a few more mandatory stops on the way home, a few more times of hoisting, pulling and dragging myself in and out of the truck, I was finally home. I did not have fun. It was not the nice, relaxing outting I thought it would be. I hurt myself. Shoulders, knees, and back hurt so bad that Ultram didn't touch it. Hot bath soak didn't touch it. Ultram kept me awake again last night until 4am. Was already tired from 4 hours of sleep the night before. Today? I hurt. I'm tired. My head is absolutely killing me. I feel kind of grouchy. I did not pace myself yesterday. At all. You know what though? Fibro didn't win because I did go out and do these things. I didn't hide away in my house, behind my computer screen.
All of this, and he didn't even get one of these: