Pasta Salad

Living with a chronic illness, we all have those days where we just don't feel like cooking.  I'm sure all of you can say that you've had days where you've skipped eating, due to pain and fatigue.  I can remember many times in the past, where I've sat here hungry, but would rather just starve to death & die than to get up and go cook food to eat haha.  If you're anything like me, you're always looking for new recipes that are quick & easy!  Here's a recipe of mine that's quick, easy, and will last you a couple of days.  -I just made it again today!

Pasta Salad

Cook one box of Rainbow pasta, el dente and place it in a large bowl.  Dump in one bag of mini-pepperoni, or if you can't find them cut about 1/2 of a large package of regular sized pepperoni into 1/4's and add them to the bowl.  Chop up a little fresh broccoli and cauliflower and add it. Add around 1/4 bag of thin carrot sticks. Put in about 1/2 jar of sliced green olives.  Add a small container of grape tomatoes.  Dump in a bag of co-jack cheese cubes.  Add 1 bottle of Italian Dressing, and mix it all up then refrigerate it for a few hours until it's good and cold, then serve!  

Tonight, mine is missing the carrots because I had a fibro-fog moment at the grocery store and forgot to get them.  It's also missing the tomatoes because my daughter doesn't like them and asked me to leave them out.  Sometimes if I have them on hand, I'll also add some mild banana pepper rings to it.

Minus the cooking time for the pasta, the rest only takes about 10 minutes to put together so it makes a quick, easy dish that you can eat on for a few days!  Not only is it easy for me to make, but it's a family favorite in my house!  

I hope that this is helpful to some of you, and that you enjoy it as much as we do!

I Need Heat!

I detest asking for any kind of help when it's for personal reasons, but I don't have a choice.  With my health conditions, going outside in the winter is hard enough on me, let alone living in a cold house, without a working furnace.

A couple weeks ago I went to bed with the furnace working fine.  The next morning when I woke up, it was chilly in the house.  I turned up the heat to take the chill off, and nothing happened.  I then realized something was wrong with the furnace.  

I have a friend that lives in another state and her husband owns a HVAC shop.  Her husband called me, and tried to walk me through some steps to see if he could figure out what the problem was.  He deducted that it wasn't something simple and said I'd have to have a technician come look at it.

After posting on a local garage sale site, a certified technician said that he'd repair it for me, just for the cost of parts.  He finally was able to come look at it this past Monday.  It turns out that I need a new inducer motor, control board, and something with my vent for the poisonious gases.  He looked up the price of the parts in front of me, and they're around $900  ...and I do believe that was before taxes.  He said a brand new furnace would run about $2000.  

To say this made me physically sick, is an understatement.  I'm disabled due to chronic neuroimmune health conditions and I live off of $721 a month.  That barely runs my household and buys food.  It's impossible for me to come up with the money on my own.

I contacted our community agencies and there's only one program that could help me out, but I don't qualify because you have to have insurance on your home.  I bought this house at sheriff sale and due to the number of years it sat empty without insurance, plus it's age, the cheapest home insurance quote I could find, was $387 a month.  No way in the world I could afford that, so the house isn't insured.  

I'm using an electric space heater, which scares me to death that it will cause a fire, and an electric blanket.  The heater is keeping it about 56 degrees in here right now, and we have colder weather that moved in today.  Next Tuesday on my birthday, November 18th, the high is only going to be in the 20's.  I live in NW Ohio, and it get's cold here!  

If I can get the money to repair the furnace, I'll do that.  If donations exceed the repair and are enough to replace my old furnace, I'll replace it.  If there's anything beyond that, I'll fix the hole in the roof in my back room, that's letting cold air pour in through it.  

Please help me spread my campaign by sharing it across your social media networks. You can click HERE to view or donate to this campaign.  Thanks so much!

Check This Out!!

We're only 2 days into March ....and on the first day of March I had already earned $45 in gift cards from the game site that I'm an ambassador on!

Last month, I won a new Keurig and a Garmin GPS Sports Watch!

If you'd like to win prizes for free too, sign up for free HERE

*I do receive free points for sign ups*

Amazon $100 Gift Card Giveaway

Hosted by:

NYSavingSpecials

Sponsored by:

Gazers

Co-Hosted by:

Simple Sherryl, Barbara's Beat, 

Capri's Coupons, The Deal Match Maker, 

Rainy Day Pennies, Giveaway Lovers, 

Kaisy Daisy's Corner, Libby's Library, 

Posh On A Budget, The Minister's Wife Stamps and Saves, The Crafty Side Of Sarcasm, 

Jenny Saved A Penny, My Devotional Thoughts, 

Merlot Mommy, Maria's Space and 

Health, Beauty, Children and Family
 

Who wouldn't like a FREE $100 to spend on Amazon?! Good luck to you because ...One lucky winner will win 

a

Amazon Gift Card $100

Dates:

Feb 14  12:01am to Feb. 28 11:59pm

All entries are optional,

Continental US resident only

We appreciate the support of our sponsor, co-hosts and bloggers promoting, please show your support by following them on their social media pages.

a Rafflecopter giveaway 
Disclaimer: The Fibro Frog is not responsible for the awarding of the prize.  If you have any questions about this giveaway, please email the host at nysavingspecials@gmail.com

Play Games and Earn Free GC's and Merchandise

People with Fibro, CFS, and autoimmune diseases are often bed and/or house-bound due to pain and fatigue.  I know beyond a doubt how boring and daunting this can be, so I turn to the internet for my entertainment.  I found a game site a few months ago, that's free to join and free to play the games.  -Because let's face it, $$$$ is usually an issue for those of us with chronic health problems.  Most of us can't work anymore, we have co-pays for doctor and specialist visits, prescriptions, etc.that eat away at our budgets.  I liked the site so well, I applied to become an ambassador for them,a nd was accepted!

You play games to earn points.  They also have game tournaments that you use points to enter, to win a prize or to win more points back.  They have auctions for new merchandise, that you use your points to bid with.  They also have a rewards page, where if you see something you'd like to have, you use your points to "order" the item.

I've done real well since joining the site.  I've earned 2-$25 Amazon GC's, one $25 pre-paid Visa card, a mini-sampler box of See's Candies, an infinity necklace, and my latest prize?  On Feb. 1st I won an auction for a Keurig B40 Elite!!!!  It's been shipped so it should be here sometime this week!  The Keurig is for me, but I'm going to keep building up rewards all year long, so that Christmas won't cost me anything at all out of pocket this year!

You too can earn rewards by joining the free game site! Just click HERE to sign up!  Earn free rewards + gives us hours of free entertainment = a win for us all!

Chronic Pain Webinar Dates

I'm holding a chronic pain webinar and hope you all join me, so that WE can all start educating and advocating for a cure for chronic pain/fatigue illnesses!  The more informed and educated that WE are, the more WE can all start making a difference.  Join me for discussions on research evidence that Fibromyalgia IS a real disorder and how that's been proven.  Learn what some of the top myth's surrounding Fibromyalgia are, and why they're myth's.  I'll discuss ideas and ways for you to try and get your family members, friends, and community members to understand what living a day in the life of a FMS/CFS/ME patient is really like.  WE'll go over some of the hurtful, rude, stereotypical comments that are sometimes directed at us.  Some of the information that WE will cover would also be very useful for you to open up a discussion to your doctor and/or his staff, if you are being treated by a doctor that doesn't act like they really believe what this awful syndrome puts us through.  We'll also go over some tips that may help you in a pain flare, along with just how little money for research the federal government hands out for research on Fibromyalgia compared to some other diseases.  I'll also be covering some statistics related to living with chronic pain that will be a real eye opener to some of you.  If WE don't start advocating for ourselves and others with our same conditions, then how can WE expect any one else to?  WE have to stand up and make people start taking notice of us, and let them know that WE refuse to sit back any longer. That WE demand our peers take notice of what WE go through on a daily basis just to survive.  I can't fight this fight alone, I need YOUR help.  This is something that WE can accomplish together though!

March 23, 2013 I'll be presenting the webinar at 2pm EST and then again at 7pm EST.  I'm also planning on presenting the webinar again on Sunday March 24th, at the same times as the Saturday presentations.  I'll except sign-ups until 10pm on Friday March 22nd.  If you'd like to join in, the cost is $25 and you're more then welcome to have your whole family, or some of your friends, sitting in with you at the webinar.  I know for me, it was a constant struggle in the beginning for my family to really grasp how Fibromyalgia truly effected my life.  My mom and youngest daughter accompanied me to my first live seminar and afterwards my mother told me that she "gets" it now.  She told me that she'd learned things from my seminar about my condition, that she hadn't known just from us talking about my condition at the mother/daughter level.  She had tears, when she finally "got it".  My daughter gave me a huge hug and told me that she's sorry that she'd blow me off when I'd want her to sit down to discuss my illnesses with her.  She also apologized for not helping me as much as she could have.  If your family & friends are having a hard time realizing what this does to your body and mind, they will really benefit from sitting in on this webinar.  

Send payment via PayPal by Friday March 22, 2013. The email address to send the money to is: jaammull (at) aol (dot) com.  Please make sure that you send it to me as a "gift".  Also, make sure that in the notes section you give me your name and which session you're signing up for.  By 12am Saturday, March 23rd, I'll email you with the instructions on where to go, to gain access to the webinar.  

The webinar will run for approximately 2 hours, give or take due to audience participation and questions.  You should have a notebook and pen handy, in case you'd like to jot some notes and/or questions down.  The more people we have joining us in our discussion, the more we all have the potential to learn from one another so please pass this webinar information along throughout all of your social media sites and by word of mouth to your friends, family, doctors, hospitals, clinics, etc.  I hope to see you all there!  

Gentle Butterfly Hugs to you all!

Everything Hurts

Last night was rough pain wise and it's continued through the entire day and night tonight.  I can't hardly move.  When the pain is this bad, it starts to really get me down and make me feel depressed.  Even my head, upper legs, and the back of my arms hurt tonight, in addition to my every day pain of neck, shoulders, knees, lower back, and mid-back.  I'm so sick of hurting all the time.  I just wish that I could look and feel good for one single day ...and when that day arrived have the money to take advantage of it by going shopping, out to eat, then out to a movie or live performance or something.  I want to walk around, and laugh and have fun.  I want to go out and walk through parks, taking nature photos as I go.  I used to do this.  It would hurt me, but it was doable.  Now?  No way.  I used to take my camera pretty much anywhere I went.  Now, not only can't I stop along the side of a road to walk out in the middle of a field to take a photo I may want to take, but I can't even hold the camera up long enough to walk anywhere with it.  Well, I can hold it up, it just causes me extreme pain in my arms, neck and shoulders.  So therefore, I can't still do it.  Not enjoyably anyway.

I can't convey the excitement I'd feel when I would take photos.  The excitement of getting home and downloading them all, to see what natural beauty I had captured at that particular second in the universe.  That nano-second in time that could never, ever be reproduced.  The photo above is one of those nano-seconds that I captured.  The top of the cloud looks as if it's lined with silver.  Rays of golden light opening up out of the cloud and reaching towards the sky.  As if it's a tunnel of light to heaven.  All of the rays of gold to the right side of the photo.  Like rays of golden hope.  Hope, that if I keep talking; that if I keep writing; if I keep advocating for more research, that maybe, just maybe a cure or at least a concrete universal treatment plan may be found.  If not found in time for me to utilize it, then at least in time for my daughter or others younger then me, to take advantage of it.  

It really hurts my heart, that so many people (most people) just doesn't have a clue how bad this pain can be.  I call these people DHAC's, which stands for "doesn't have a clue".  Most DHAC's are well-meaning people and aren't trying to hurt us, or make us mad, they just honestly really DHAC.  I have a DHAC in my life.  She is the sweetest woman in her early 50's and she really cares about me.  She's pretty much the only adult IRL (in real life) friend that I have anymore, and I'm pretty sure I won't even have her for much longer.  At least once every week or two she'll call me up telling me that I need to get myself out of my house.  She'll tell me how I should be going to the gym to do cardio and weight lifting with her.  The best thing that she regurgitates at me at least once a week?  "Well, you know my BFF K. that I've had for 30 years.  She has fibro and she gets around so much better then you do.  You just need to snap out of it.".  OR....she tells me over and over how there's a 60 year old woman who works out at her gym who has Fibromyalgia so if she can do it, then I certainly should be able to do it too.

See, that's the funny thing about Fibromyalgia or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, arthritis, even auto-immune diseases such as Lupus, RA, etc.  You can line 20 people (or 50, or a 100) up beside each other and you may not hit two people who have the exact same symptoms.  You may not hit two people who are affected the same way.  They'll all have varying degrees of pain.  Some people only have a few of the symptoms of fibro and others may be affected worse by their symptoms and pain levels.  Just as when what people call "the flu" (that is actually an intestinal virus) some people have a bad case of it and some people have a less severe case of it.  Unfortunately, I have a "bad case" of Fibromyalgia.  I have all the symptoms and co-conditions.  I have the acid reflux, I have the IBS, the Fibro Fog & memory loss, the insomnia, and on and on and on.  Does this well-meaning friend honestly think that I like not going out and doing things?  No, I don't.  I despise it.  You can't even begin to understand how bored and lonely and stir crazy I go.  Days like the last few though, I don't really have much of a choice.  I always have to use the chair arms to "push" myself out of my chair and yell "ow".  The last few days it's a double "ow" because the back of my arms hurt so badly too.  

My pain has been so bad for the last two days that I'm really not dealing with it well by tonight.  Not at all.  I'm starting to feel whiny, and I keep blinking back tears.  Just typing these words made me start feeling emotional again and I had to shove the tears away.  I seriously feel as if I'm losing my mind and going mad from the pain.  It isn't like I have a little pain.  I have pain.  -I had four children natural without pain meds.  I know what pain is, and I have real, debilitating, pain.  When I was first trying to come to grips with my illnesses, I kept asking "why me?".  "Why me God?  What have I done to deserve a life filled with pain every single day?".  I always felt that God wanted me to use my sicknesses to help others who are also sick.  I thought he wanted me to educate and advocate to fight for the rights of those of us afflicted.  I felt that he wanted me to bring awareness to the table, to advocate for more research for a cure.  Now?  I'm not so sure.  I feel that if I had been right, that God would've opened the doors for my chronic pain seminars.  Maybe it just isn't the right time yet?  I don't know.  All I do know is that's where my passion lays.  I also know that presenting chronic pain seminars is the only type of work I could possibly do at this point in my life.  Due to the fact that it isn't something I'd be doing every day, along with the fact that they only take a couple of hours, hours that I could alternate standing and sitting as needed while doing it, it's the only way I can fathom to do to support my daughter and myself.  I've always heard the saying "God helps those who help themselves".  I've tried every thing I can think of to try and help myself on opening the doors to public speaking and advocacy and it still hasn't panned out.  My birthday is November 18th, and I've posted everywhere that the only thing I want for my birthday this year, is to have enough money to present at least one chronic pain seminar.  God bless those who've donated to my chronic pain seminar fund on GoFundMe, but I've only raised $75 in the four months that I've been advocating and asking for donations.  -And you guys can't imagine how hard it was for me to make the page and ask in the first place.  I really don't think there's any way for me to hit my birthday goal of having the $75 raised up enough to hold at least one seminar.  I've said before that I'm not looking for a free handout.  I'm looking for people and/or businesses that believe in me and in what I'm trying to do.  I'm looking for the help of getting started.  After the first couple, then the seminars will start paying for themselves.

The grief wheel is a funny thing.  I'm not sure that you ever get out of it.  I'm beginning to think that it's something you just keep going around and around and around on until you die.  Every time I think I've finally come full circle with it, I find myself in the questioning and angry stage again.  Then we start all over.  I'm dizzy and sick of spinning around on this silly wheel.  Enough is enough.  Unfortunately though, since doctors and scientists doesn't have a cure, or even any single medicine that will take away my pain and my fatigue, I'm just stuck here going around and around and around.  No matter how hard I have to fight to believe and have hope, I will.  Hope that a cure will be found.  Hope that research will provide answers so that medicine that works will come to light.  Hope that a door will be opened for me, and my career in advocacy will take off.  I can't lose faith of my hope, because if I do then what will I have left?  

If You'd Only -------- You Could Cure Yourself

I've heard that phrase SO many times lately that I'm ready to scream, cry, and pull my hair out!  I have a friend who means well, but calls me every few days telling about some cactus-juice-wheat-germ-iodine-swim-in-warm-water-while-blowing-through-a-hose-while-pouring-holy-water-on-my-head cure that works "..and I really mean it because my best-friend's-cousin-who-is-friends-with-my-grandma-who-lives-in-Belgium-with-the-brother-of-a-priest-who-had-a-prophecy-that-this-will-work" was cured of her Fibromyalgia and she had a really bad case of it! Hmmm ....really?  That's so not interesting.

Does this woman honestly believe that if there was a proven "cure" for Fibromyalgia that I wouldn't already have jumped on it?!  Nooo, I wouldn't do that because I like living virtually every day of my life in pain.  I like the fact that I can't go work and make money that I desperately need.  I like feeling as if I have Alzheimers at the age of 41.  I absolutely love trying to talk to someone and then sitting there saying "ummm... ummmm.... shoot!  I forgot what I was going to say.".  I also really love the fact that my concentrate is just so great.  You know, I've only spent close to an hour and a half now to write these two paragraphs.  -Not time consuming what-so-ever.  I absolutely love the insomnia that I deal with on a daily basis.  You know, because life is just so much brighter when you look at it with 2-4 hours of sleep!  I just jump up and down with excitement over the depression that the pain and insomnia cause.

No matter how well meaning people are when they say this stuff to you, it gets really old, really fast.  Seriously, I go to the 2nd rated Rheumatology clinic in the entire U.S.  If there was a cure, they'd know about it.  They'd have me on it.  I wouldn't be desperately advocating for research to find a cure.  I wouldn't be trying so desperately hard to educate people about the myths and truths of living with a chronic pain and fatigue illness.

Every time Sara says something like this, I try to carefully let her know that I appreciate the fact that she cares about me, but that there is NO cure for Fibromyalgia.  She just adamantly keeps arguing with me that isn't true.  This is just another reason why holding my chronic pain seminar is so very important to me.  There's just so many myths out there that need to be dispelled.  If they aren't, then I'm seriously going to lose my mind one of these days and end up completely unloading on one of these well-meaning people in my life. Please remember that I'm doing a $1 challenge, and share it with your family and friends.  My prayer is that I have enough in donations by my birthday, November 18th, to hold at least one seminar.  To pay for the conference room and to pay for advertising.  I challenge everyone who reads this post, to donate $1 to my GoFundMe.org page.  You will find the donate button on the right hand side of this blog.  Once you're on my donation page, I ask that you please share the link on your social media sites.  You all can't imagine how grateful I am for every single $1 donation that's made towards my cause.  If you can't accept the $1 challenge, then I ask that you'd please at least share my donation page via your social media sites.  I appreciate each and every one of you out there!

All The Small Things

You hear people say this, and tend to roll your eyes.  I know, I've done it myself in the past.  I've seen people do it too many times to count.  The little things in life, are all too commonly taken for granted.  People don't realize this though.  Even when it's told to them, they kind of nonchalantly stare past you while nodding their head up and down and grunting something that's barely audible as a "yeah".  

I'm here to tell you though, that the little things really do mean a lot.  Living my life with chronic pain and fatigue illnesses shoves just how true this saying is, right down my throat on almost a daily basis.  I said, and have written many times, that I'd give anything to have just one week, or even one day, where I could do the little things in life without paying for it with unrelenting pain and fatigue for days after.  I got my wish.  This past Thursday I had more energy then I've felt in a long time.  My pain level was low.  I honestly couldn't believe it, seeing as how I've been stuck in a pain and insomnia flare since my husband left me on April 8th.  My energy and low pain level lasted all day Thursday, Thursday night, and Friday.  Friday night though, I went to stand up and had to push & pry myself out of my chair while loudly exclaiming "Ouch!".  My knees were so stiff and hurt so badly.  Usually once I'm up and take a few steps, the pain diminishes until I go to sit down again, then the bending motion of sitting makes me say "Ouch!" one more time.  Not this time though.  My knees stayed stiff all the way to the kitchen and all the way back to my chair.  Each step caused excruciating pain.  I sat down and mentally cussed to myself that the pain & fatigue couldn't have held out for another 24 hours.  See, my youngest daughter turned 17 this past Saturday.  She was having a bonfire birthday party Saturday night to celebrate.  I held on to hope though, that I'd wake up Saturday pretty well pain free again.

I went to bed, mumbling the prayer to please allow me to wake up Saturday with energy and low levels of pain. Every year on their birthday, I allow my children to pick what they'd like me to make for supper that night.  My daughter had requested my home made broccoli, rice, and cheese casserole.  It certainly is good, but a ton of standing to chop the onion and celery, and a ton of standing and stirring until the cheese is melted.  I also had to make her birthday cake on Saturday.  Saturday rolled around, and as I got out of bed I knew I was once again doomed.  My body hurt. I was so tired that I felt like I was in a fog.  I felt as if I hadn't ever gone to sleep the night before, and like I was outside of my body watching it move around.  Regardless, I had these things to do and just had to do them regardless of how I felt.  

I've always loved baking.  I've always loved celebrating my children's birthdays.  The fact that I couldn't do things that I always enjoyed, was like a kick in the gut.  Fibromyalgia and arthritis once again had stolen my joy.  I really had to push myself to get the things done that I needed to do.  I kept angrily thinking to myself "Yeah, of course!  Of course the break in pain and fatigue couldn't have held out for one more day.".  In the middle of my self-pity episode though, I stopped myself and thought "What are you doing?  You've wrote, prayed, begged for just one day without the horrible pain and fatigue.  You got more then one day. You got a day and half reprieve from it.  Don't be greedy Amy.  Be thankful.".  That stopped me from the stomping around and feeling sorry for myself.  I even felt kind of guilty for being angry that the reprieve didn't hold out.

After pushing myself Saturday and Saturday night, I'm still paying for it today.  I'm so stinking tired.  I didn't get out of bed until 1:38pm today, and yet I feel like I'm walking around in a fog.  I can't concentrate on anything.  I've been trying to write this blog post for over an hour and a half now, and this is all I've wrote.  People take things like writing something they want to say for granted.  Things as simple as baking a cake are taken for granted.  People sometimes say "I don't feel like cooking tonight, let's just go out to eat".  The fact that they can cook if they so choose, is taken for granted.  For me and people like me, we'd give anything to be able to go stand in the kitchen and cook a meal.  To prepare the meal without it causing such pain that we are literally in tears.  People always complain about hating to do their dishes or their laundry.  At least they can do their dishes and their laundry.  

Today is Tuesday, and just from making a casserole, baking a cake, and cleaning up the mess and dishes from the casserole and cake on Saturday, I'm still paying for it today.  I hurt.  I'm beyond fatigued.  I can't concentrate.  I can't accomplish any major task today without it being extremely mentally and physically hard for me.  I'd give anything to be able to do simple, everyday things again.  Things that others look at as a chore, I'd be tickled pink to be able to do.  Until you live your life trapped within pain and fatigue, you really don't understand how little things mean a lot.  The next time you have to fold and put away your laundry, stop and think about this post.  Instead of huffing and puffing and thinking how much you "hate" doing this chore, stop and realize how lucky you are that you are able to do the chore without paying for doing it, for the next few days to few weeks.  Start thinking about your life, and appreciating all the little things that you're able to do.  They may not be "fun" tasks, they you can do them.  

Days like today, remind me why I push so hard to try and book chronic pain seminars.  Days like today, remind me why I'm so desperate to educate family members, friends, the communities and health care workers.  Lawyers, lawmakers, pharmaceutical companies, and legislature, about life with a chronic pain and fatigue illness.  As I always say, if we can't make others understand then we won't even have a prayer of finding a cure for these illnesses.  We won't have a prayer of finding a concrete treatment plan that relieves us of the symptoms that plague us.  Education is key.  As my photo below says, "Education is key.  Without education there won't be change.  Without change, there won't be research.  Without research, there won't be a cure.".   I'm not a pushy type of person at all.  In fact, there's no way I could make a living in sales.  No way.  I'm just not the type of person that could approach someone and try to push them to make them "buy" something.  I also hate confrontation.  I despise asking for help or accepting help.  Accepting help really hurts my pride and makes me feel inadequate that I needed help in the first place.  After telling you all of this, I hope you see how far out of my comfort zone I've gone, to ask for donations to help me get going in presenting my chronic pain seminar.  I hate asking for donations, and it honestly really does hurt me.  Still, I've sucked my own feelings up and I've asked for help.  I'm still asking for help.  This seminar, and the hope of finding a cure for my illnesses outweighs my own "pride".  I'm not doing this just for me though.  I'm doing it for the 1,000's of people like me, who suffer and struggle to make it through a day.  It's no wonder why depression runs with these illnesses.  Wouldn't you too be depressed, if you had to live every day in pain?  If you had to live every day being more tired then when you went to bed the night before?  If you couldn't even stop and appreciate the "little things" that life has to offer.  Once again, please share this blog and my mission with every friend, relative, business, organization, etc that you can.  If everyone would donate even $1 to the chronic pain seminar fund, it would add up quickly and I'd be able to start presenting this seminar and advocating for more research.  I challenge every person that reads this post, to donate $1 to the fund and to challenge all of your friends and family to also accept this challenge.  The link to the seminar donation page is on the right hand side of the home page or on the right hand side of the "Chronic Pain Seminar" page.  It's the Go Fund Me link.  Please feel free to download this photo and share it within your networks.  I took this photo myself (another small thing that I struggle now to do - photography) and the words are my own so there isn't any copyright infringement to worry about.

HomeMade Broccoli, Rice, and Cheese Casserole

This is a recipe that my mom passed down to me, and my oldest son and youngest daughter both love it more then anything! On their birthday, I always make the kids whatever they want for supper.  Today is my Courtney's birthday!  My "baby" is 17 already! Every chance she gets to beg for my Broccoli, Rice, & Cheese casserole she does! So, this was part of our supper tonight.  This photo is before I popped it into the oven!

Shhhh.....don't tell anyone but I'm going to spill my "secret" recipe with you, just because I feel that all of you here on The Fibro Frog are my family!  

1c. thinly sliced celery

1c. diced onion

2 boxes frozen Freshlike brand cut, chopped broccoli (Freshlike brand is the only one around here that sells the cut/chopped broccoli)

1lrg. can cream of mushroom soup

4c. shredded mild cheddar cheese

2.5c. instant rice (uncooked)

Enough butter melted in a skillet to saute the onion and celery.  

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Saute the onions and celery until tender.  Open broccoli and put it in a strainer.  Run under hot water to thaw the broccoli.  Add it to the sauteed onions and celery.  Add the cream of mushroom soup, rice, and cheese.  Keep stirring until cheese is completely melted.  Make sure you have all of the rice completely mixed in and covered by the soup and cheese.  Put into a 13x9 baking pan and bake for approximately 45 minutes.  It will be a nice golden brown color when finished. For some reason the coloring in my photo is off.  It really isn't as brown as it looks in this photo.  I hope you all enjoy this recipe as much as we do!

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Could You Pass The Rootbeer, Please?

Early this past Sunday morning, I woke up and was swallowing over and over to try and keep from throwing up.  Thank goodness that it's only about 4 giant leaps from the edge of my bed, to my toilet.  I moved quicker then I have in years!  I ended up grabbing the trash can and taking it back to my bed.  It's a kitchen sized can, 13 gallon.  It was the perfect height to match the top edge of my bed.  

From that moment on, all I did was hang my head over, with my eyes still shut, and got sick.  Over and over and over.  At 4:30pm Sunday afternoon I finally managed to crawl from my bed, to my computer chair.  I was only up for 3.5 hours before I had to go back to bed.  To say I was sick, was an understatement. Honestly, I laid on my side, crying, and telling myself that death may be a welcomed distraction willing myself not to vomit any more.  I couldn't remember when I'd ever been so sick.  I vomited so much, and so hard, that I lost my voice.  All I could do until today, was croak out a soft, raspy whisper.  Even yesterday when my parents called to make sure I was still alive see if I was feeling better, they couldn't make out what I was trying to say to them on the phone.

So, we've all heard this talk about spoons.  Most of us have read The Spoon Theory (which is wonderful, btw) and understand that we only have so many spoons each and every day to work with.  With the roasting hot sweating, then chilling, then vomiting, then groaning, then having my hip or shoulder start hurting from laying in bed so long so I'd have to slowly move while demanding praying that movement didn't make me vomit anymore, my spoons were gone.  Quickly.  My spoons for Monday were also gone.  In the blink of an eye.  Pretty much I've figured out, my spoons for this entire WEEK are gone. 

Today is the first day that I've felt slightly human again.  Good news, right?!  Well, I thought it would be good news, but no.  Now, I've been fighting a headache (possibly a sinus headache) the entire day and night.  It starts getting late and my crappy insomnia rears it's ugly head.  My neck and shoulders are throbbing.  I walked out to the kitchen to get a glass of ice water, and my mid-back had me blinking back tears of joy pain all the way back to my computer chair.  -Don't forget, my computer chair is the only seat I have in this entire house that doesn't kill my back to sit in.  My knees make me cuss under my breath holler a loud "OUCH" every time I stand.  The front of my upper legs, are throbbing with pain. I just took two Tramadol pain pills, and two Tylenol.  I also took 100mg of Amitriptyline.  Why am I whining and complaining telling you all this?  I'm telling you all this, because I'm sick of it.  Come on, I couldn't have ONE dang day and night where I didn't hurt so bad that I could lose my mind scream?

Same crap, different day.  Horrible pain flare.  Horrible insomnia flare.  I can't lie, I have had a few days here and there since April where I wasn't in excruciating, mind blowing, blood curling pain, but I've had a ton of flares, that last and last before getting a break.  Insomnia, on the other hand, has been a horrible, vile, viscous monster since April.  Every night, I sit here so tired I could literally cry.  I sit here in pain.  I take 100mg of Amitriptyline then sit and wait for it to ever kick in so that I may get a few hours of sleep.  I take the tramadol and most of the time either Tylenol or Ibuprofen in addition, then sit and pray that it at least dulls some of the deep muscular and joint aches and pains, so that I can fall asleep when the Amitriptyline kicks in. My fibro fog has been so bad this week, that I've forgotten my daytime meds two or three times.  I'm just sick to death of it all!  I feel like all I do is eat pills, sit and wait, pray they work.

Do you want to know something else that pisses me off makes me mad?  No matter what it is that someone in my household gets, I get it a hundred-million-trillion times worse then they do.  If one of my kids has a mild cold, I get bronchitis.  If one of my kids gets bronchitis, I get pneumonia.  No joke.  I sick so much easier, and so much worse, then anyone around me.  I swear, every time that I go somewhere that's super crowded I get sick.  It doesn't matter how many times I wash my hands.  It doesn't matter how many gallons bottles of hand sanitizer I use, I get sick.  A week ago Saturday we went to Fort Rapids Resort and Indoor Water Park.  We left for home Sunday, late afternoon.  One week later, this past early Sunday a.m. is when I started vomiting from some nasty bug.  

This 3am bs crap?  Yeah, it's 3am when I'm lucky, has got to stop.  I know that's part of my problem.  Did you realize insomnia lowers your immune system?  Yep, it's true. It really does.  If you do a google search on the topic, you'll get more information about it then you'd ever believe you could.  Just for a quick reference though, check out THIS link for some information on it from The Mayo Clinic.  Did you also know that studies have proven that insomnia causes depression?  Check out THIS article from CBS News.  

Now that I'm done whining like a 2 year old about my miserable, crappy life, I'll go on to a more upbeat, positive approach.  EDUCATION IS KEY!  May is Fibromyalgia Awareness Month, but September is Chronic Pain Awareness Month and anyone with Fibromyalgia knows that chronic pain is a huge part of their daily lives.  Having all these "awareness" months honestly seems like a big ole bottle of hog wash to me. If you're going to advocate and try to spread awareness, why in the heck would you just do it one month out of the year? Hmm ....something to think about, isn't it?  If we don't educate the community, the health care workers, the politicians, the pharmaceutical companies, our own FAMILIES & FRIENDS, then how will change ever come about?  We have to stand up and make everyone understand what it's like to live just one week; heck just one day, in our lives.  If anyone knows of a church or a company, an organization or a conference, or even a community, that would be interested in being educated about living with chronic pain & fatigue from a patients view, please send them to me.  I wish I could present my chronic pain seminar somewhere every single weekend.  Even if I had to crawl to the front due to a pain flare, I assure you I'd be there anyway!  Also, if you know of any person, group, business, or organization that would be willing to donate to my chronic pain seminar fund, please give them THIS link.  I'm trying to raise funds to rent conference rooms at large hotels, and advertising money, to present this seminar.  

Thank you all for listening to my whining and ranting.  It feels good to know that I'm not alone out there, but at the same time I hate to know that there ARE people out there who knows where I'm coming from and how I feel.  I hope & pray that someday in the near future we'll have a cure for chronic pain and fatigue disorders.  Or at the very least a standard, universal treatment plan that actually works!  In the mean time, since I can't have a real beer due to all of my meds, could you please pass me a root beer to drown my sorrows in? 

Bad Day

Do you ever have one of those days? You know, one of those days that seem bad from the moment you crack your eyes open? Well, that's been me today. I finally fell asleep last night this morning around 5am or so. I heard the kids come home around noon and cracked my eyes open not wanting to move. From there, it just seems as if it's gone downhill.

I haven't been able to stop yawning all day long. As for waking up as tired as when I went to bed? I've been more tired then when I went to bed. My head has killed me all day. I've felt as if someone yanked the plug out of the electrical socket on me. I haven't been able to concentrate on anything for more then about 5 minutes at a time, and doing anything has caused extreme pain in my back. My knees? Yeah, I feel and sound like an 80 or 90 year old woman every time I go from a sitting to a standing position. I have to use the arms on the chair to help pry myself up, moaning outloud in pain as I do so. Pain or not, I was bound and determined to make supper tonight. My daughter loves my homemade broccoli, rice and cheese casserole and had asked me to make it for her. Once I had it ready to baked, and shoved it into the oven, I came back in here as quickly as I could with walking hunched over and collapsed into my computer chair. I was gasping from the pain in my back and was near tears. After resting for about 30 minutes I got up and went in to bread and fry the meat. Again, at about 1/2 through, I was in so much pain I couldn't hardly stand it. Trying to hurry, I ended up trying to fry my little finger along with the meat! Yep, while dropping a piece of meat into the boiling, bubbling grease, I stuck my little finger right down into it!! I'm not gonna lie, that made me gasp and say a few curse words under my breath as I was flipping on the cold water in which to drown my finger in. This meat,...this dang breaded and fried in HOT oil meat, was a new recipe. Guess what? It. Was. Disgusting. So, I didn't even burn my finger over something that was good. It wasn't even worth it in the slightest LOL. I took one bite and threw mine away. Yuck! So, I'd been weighing the cost of whether I should print out one copy of all of my seminar handouts then take them to Staples to have all the copies printed or if I should just print them all from home. Since the dead beat....or I mean, the man, that I'm still legally married to hasn't paid me one single penny of child support or alimony since May money has been super tight to say the least. Somehow, he had the money to take himself and his girlfriend to Cedar Point last Saturday, but miraculously he doesn't know "when" he can send my daughter and I any support according to the text her sent her. So, I decided that it may take longer, but would be more cost effective for me in my situation to just print them here at home. A new black printer cartridge is only $11.99 for me, because I buy refurbished. That sounded a ton better to me then paying out $50-$75 for copies at the store. With the day I had been having I should have known better. It printed a few copies, then it said that something was wrong with the ink cartridge. We took it out a couple times and reseeded it, to no avail. I turned it off then back on. Nope, nothing. Still that damn flashing yellow light. We unplugged it and let it sit for awhile. Still nothing. I removed the cartridge once again and used a damp coffee filter with bottled water and wiped the contacts down on the cartridge and inside the printer. Finally! It worked again! The catch? I'd set it for 40 copies and 1 would come out. Yep, one. Do you have any idea how easy hard it is to keep track of how many copies you've printed when you're sitting there clicking the print button ...waiting on the page to print ...dropping it into a pile ...then doing it all again? With a horrible headache? Being in pain and yawning all the while??! I still tolerated it and kept trying to plug along. Next thing I know, it's printing the page as if it's printed over it a hundred couple of times. What was wrong with it this time?? I don't have a clue. I gave up. I threw in the towel on it for now. Maybe I'll try again in a bit. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll find the money to go have the copies made rather then doing them themselves. I don't know. I don't know anything today/tonight! The only thing I do know tonight is that it's been a bad day and I'm sick of it! I'm ready for tomorrow to get here, as it'll have to be a better day, wouldn't it? I opened a new tab, played this song, and wrote this whining, complaining blog post! This song always helps me to feel better when I listen to it and sing along! Oh yeah, be sad I mean happy that this isn't a video post because I guarantee you that I'd never make it as a singer LOL. I do much better at sitting here complaining then I do singing. Alas, it's a feel good song that I love. Well, back to attempt the printing process yet again. I'm quickly running out of time. The seminar is Saturday. Two measly days away. I need to get crackin'!

Quality VS Quantity Of Life

Last night, I went with my kids and their friends to the little village that's 5 miles away from us.  They have a little one day festival type thing, then end the night with fireworks.  Since I wasn't able to watch fireworks on the 4th of July, I was excited to go.

Every year I take photos of the fireworks but this year, I decided to try and video them too.  My camera is a Canon T3i and it's supposed to have professional quality HD video built in.  I'd never tried using it before though, so I was fumbling around in the dark trying to figure it out lol.  I couldn't believe though, how much it hurt me to video it.  I had to tape a little, then shut the video off, then tape a little.  A minute or so into the third taping, I had to ask my daughter to take it.  I was left with horrible neck, shoulder and arm pain, and it put a charley horse in the middle of my back.  Even with the first taping I did, I missed having it centered and getting it all in, due to the pain it was causing me to hold the camera up aimed at the sky.

I was going to upload the first clip, to show how shaky I was trying to video right from the beginning, but for some reason I couldn't get it to upload to blogger.  It keeps telling me there was a problem uploading the video, but it doesn't tell me what the problem is lol. I will insert some photos of fireworks instead I guess.  I had taken some before I got the idea to try and use my video for the first time.

We all know that doing simple household tasks can be hard or even not doable at all sometimes, but it's the simple, little things, like trying to shoot a video with a camera that always throws me for a loop.  Things that people take for granted and don't even think about.  I never would've guessed how much it would hurt me to take a video.  My neck and arms still hurt this afternoon from it.  

This is no way to have to live.  Fibromyalgia (or insert Lupus, Arthritis, CFS/ME, etc) may not be fatal, but it sure stills your quality of life.  I've always believed that quality is better then quantity, and that holds true in my health and my life.  Not being able to bend over and pick something up from the floor, or run a sweeper. Being in tears after fixing a meal...sometimes in tears after just frying an egg, having to take breaks to unload and reload a dishwasher....  I could go on and on.  That's not quality, that's quantity.  I have a friend that wants my daughter, her boyfriend, and I to go to the zoo with him.  He told me to pick a day that I wouldn't be in a lot of pain.  I rolled my eyes and told my daughter and her boyfriend that this friend of mine needs to be the first one signing up for my seminar to learn the truth about living with chronic pain.  Oh how I wish I could know what day would be better then another for pain.  Unfortunately, it just doesn't work that way.  

I'm asking again, for you all to please share this blog with your friends and family.  If you're a blogger yourself, please share this blog with your readers.  It's so very important to me, to educate people about life with an invisible illness that causes chronic pain.  Unless you live with it yourself, it's really hard to grasp what life is like, living this way.  Someone once said to me "At least you don't have cancer.  That could kill you and with this you won't die.".  I paused, then responded with "You're right.  It won't kill me.  Have you thought about the fact though, that people with cancer have hope?  There are solid treatment plans mapped out for all types of cancer.  A person with cancer, has hope of one day being cured.  They have hope of their pain and sickness ending.  Even if they do die, at least they aren't living for years and years in sickness and in pain.  One way or another, their pain ends.  I don't have that hope.  I know that I will have to live every day of my life hurting and sick.  If the quality of my life is going to be so limited and so painful, then do I really want to live until I'm 70? 80? 90 years old?".  I also went on to say that I know what a horrible beast cancer is, and my heart breaks for those that have to go through cancer.  Please don't think I'm an insensitive jerk because I'm not.  In fact, had I finished nursing school, I wanted to work in pediatric oncology.  This is just a way to get people to stop and think about what invisible illness and chronic pain sufferers go through.   I'm really hoping for a packed house for my seminar, because people really need to understand and learn.  They really need to stop and think.  Again, please share this site or my facebook page, and the flyer for my seminar.  I thank you all in advance!

Seminar Excitement!

Things are moving right along for my first chronic pain seminar.  A caring friend made this flyer for me last night.  I love it!  What do you all think of it?  The pastor of the church I'm going to hold it at, is emailing the flyer throughout all of the other churches in that denomination, and an elder is taking flyers to the hospital that she's a nursing supervisor at.  My daughter, Courtney, also posted the flyers in some online garage sale sites that are local to us.  Sunday, I'll be having all of the material for the seminar, including the flyers, printed up at Staples and will begin to start putting the packets together that I'll be giving out at the seminar.  

This has been a dream of mine, since I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia.  Although fibromyalgia is what I was diagnosed with, this seminar will help anyone who suffers from any type of chronic pain condition and/or invisible illness.  To see my dream finally coming true, is surreal to me.  Now, as long as I have people show up, I'll be feeling pretty happy!  Having people show up is probably the biggest hurdle I'm up against lol.  I'd love to be able to advertise in the newspapers around here too, but I just don't have the money for that.  My husband still is acting like he doesn't have a family.  Since he moved 3 hours away to live with some woman he met on the internet he hasn't spoke to us nor gave us any money for child support or alimony.  My hearing to get child support started isn't until the end of August.  

To know that I'm working to make my dreams come true, and actually accomplishing those dreams, fills me with a great deal of pride and personal satisfaction.  I may be sick, but I can still fight and have a voice that's heard.  I'll never give up trying to advocate for those of us with conditions such as I have.  This will be a life-long journey for me.

If everyone could leave me a comment, telling me what you would like to see discussed at a seminar such as I'll be putting on, it would mean a great deal to me.  I know what I have planned to cover, but maybe I've missed something that would be beneficial to my audience.  I'd be humbled for you all to work with me, so that I can present the best possible seminar that I can!

Pain Flare Vs Breakthrough Pain

This past weekend I mentioned to a family member that I was in a pain flare, that had started last Wednesday. She said "Oh, so you have to take more pain medicine to keep the pain away then?". I told her no, then explained the difference between a pain flare, and breakthrough pain.

So, what is the difference between a pain flare and breakthrough pain? A flare simply means an excaburation of symptoms. If your pain level is normally a 1 or a 2, and then it goes up to a 7 or an 8, then that's a flare. Usually with a flare, the usual pain medicine you take doesn't give you as effective relief as when you're not in a flare. A flare doesn't have to be related to just pain either. It can also be a flare in fatigue, fibro fog, or any other symptom. Basically, any symptom that you have, that intensifies without relief, is a flare. For your doctor to consider you to be in a true flare, your increased symptoms have to last for at least 24 hours.

With breakthrough pain, you may take a pain pill for your pain then before time for your next pill, the pain comes back. Once you take the pill again, your symptoms again settle down. This type of scenario is considered breakthrough pain.

Sometimes you can break a flare, just by increasing your rest and decreasing your activities. Sometimes you may need a short dose of steroids or a shot of cortisone. Sometimes an increase in pain meds will help. When all else fails, sometimes you just have to tuff it out until it breaks on it's own.

Last Wednesday, I started a flare. By late Thursday night, I was ready to call my rheumatologist. I didn't call on Friday though, because I knew that I wouldn't be able to be seen until at least Monday. My rheumatologist is at The Cleveland Clinic, in Cleveland, OH and it's approx. a 2 hour drive from me. My husband wouldn't be able to take the day off to get me there with that short of notice. Thankfully, my pain flare finally broke on it's own, on Sunday. This was the worst and longest pain flare I've ever had. The fibro fog that accompanied the flare was bad. It left me feeling drained, depressed and alone.

Although pain flares are to be expected when you have Fibro, CFS, Lupus, Arthritis, etc., it's still hard to deal with the symptoms when one hits. Try to figure out what caused your flare. Did you exercise too much? Were you in a stressful situation? If you can figure out your triggers for a pain flare, then you're better able to control the situations around you, that may cause a flare. I still haven't figured out what caused this last one I had. Rest assured, I'll pay more attention in the future though!